Once a year, my friend puts on a red suit
And hangs around with me and my wife
Now I can't help but feeling jealous
Each time she climbs on his knee

And she stands beneath the mistletoe, screaming
For him to stand beneath the mistletoe, screaming
Now I can't help but feeling jealous
Each time she climbs on his knee
Why must she climb on his knee?

I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard
She kissed him once and whispered in his ear
I saw my baby wearing Santa's beard
I wish he would go
He's breaking up my home

Santa's Beard