John, another friend from Truman got a weblog recently. My fellow Truman alumni, you may want to add this one to your bookmarks.

I'm pleased to present this blogswap post by Rong of The Requiest. You can read my post here, and you can see a list of all the participants here.

BlogSwap: Tough Truths

Ecclesiastes 5:18 Then I realized that it is good and proper for a man to eat
and drink, and to find satisfaction in his toilsome labor under the sun during
the few days of life God has given him-for this is his lot.

When Tim suggested that this current blogswap article be based on a tough truth
that we've dealt with or are still dealing with, I couldn't initially come up
with a thing. The truth however wasn't that there weren't any tough issues that
I've dealt with in the past but that I was wearing blinders to the one I'm currently
dealing with. So...this post is a personal confession on something that I've
dealt with my whole life, although I've very infrequently recognized it. Maybe
it's better to say that it's been very seldom that I've wanted to recognize
it. I also think that it is something that is extremely prevalent in our modern,
postmodern and or current society, take your pick. What I'm referring to is
satisfaction or being satisfied.

Is the grass green where you are, or is it the grass on the other side of the
hill that you are after? If I were a pastor and this were a sermon maybe the
title would be:

Finding satisfaction in what we have.

or

Recognizing the abundance already at hand.

I humbly and ashamedly admit, that I am almost never satisfied in what I have.
Oh I may say that I am, but that is really never the truth and I'm sure that
my wife would confirm this without any hesitation. Over the past 6 months I
have become increasingly disillusioned with my current job. I baby-sit a very
large intranet site and make sure that the CMS is working properly. Most days
I can check the system and basically be done in the first half hour of work.
Other than some minor support issues that crop up my days are long and boring.
Heck, I got into blogging to kill the boredom. Now I know that some of you are
drooling over the idea of not having to do anything all day, but believe me
it gets boring quick. Get in the Sherman and Mr. Peabody "Way Back Machine"
(for those of you under 40 this was a cartoon) and remember what summer vacation
was like come about August. Sitting with your friends out at the curb, looking
at one another and saying, "What do you want to do?" with the equal
reply of, "I don't know. What do you want to do?" Plus there is always
the worry that my development skills are getting rusty. I'd been digging around
on Monster.com and a number of other job search engines and emotionally I had
gotten to the point where I was becoming a real bear to live with at home.

This week on the way to work I found myself counting the pros to my job as
opposed to the cons.

• Even though I have a long commute I'm going totally opposite traffic and
  I'm on back roads a lot of the way, which is much better than being on the
  Capitol Beltway.
• I have incredible hours working only 8 hrs a day because I'm on contract
  and working 7:00 AM to 3:30 PM means I get home earlier than ever before.
• I'm getting paid 30% more than my last job to sit around doing next to nothing.

Now I'm sure there are some of you that are thinking this is nothing more than
pop psychology and you're actually right. Even as I write I'm wondering what's
so special about any of this. Any counselor would tell you to weigh out the
pros and the cons of a situation or try and look for the silver lining in the
storm. But the point that I'm trying to make is not just about being satisfied
with what we have but actually finding happiness with it. IMHO the word "satisfaction"
has become diluted in our vocabulary and doesn't carry the weight that it rightly
should. It can sometimes sound like we're just complacently resigned to our
lot in life or a given situation and that is not what God would have us be.
Being satisfied should be like going to a banquet and being able to eat to your
hearts content. And, it's not just any old smorgasbord of standard faire. No,
this banquet, the banquet of satisfaction, has been prepared by the finest chef
in the world. Every morsel becomes a bouquet of exciting flavors that tantalize
the palate.

Now I don't know about you, but there are times in my life, like this, when
I recognize that my thoughts just don't really seem to be my own. In the past
I've contributed a lot of that "voice in my head" to the Holy Spirit
and as I've grown in my faith I more and more find that He is the voice of greater
discernment than I could ever contribute to myself. Oh I may have known these
thoughts before, but I never really heard them before, at least not in
my heart.

It was with these thought in my mind that I started to weigh all the other
things in my life that so often leave me unsatisfied. What I found on deeper
introspection was my own failure to properly see the truth.

  Instead of being satisfied that my children are healthy both physically
and mentally or instead of seeing how much they love me or how well they behave
while out in public or how devoted they are to their grandparents who live up
the street... instead of seeing any of this how often do I instead allow an
act of forgetfulness to become a monumental failure?

  Instead of seeing my wife's commitment to me or the incredible personal
sacrifices that she makes with her job or all of the additional work that she
does in managing the house, do I instead focus on some trivial issue?

 Why is it that instead of enjoying the bounty of our banquet do we so
easily allow the souffle falling to ruin the rest of a perfectly good meal?

The next time that the grass starts looking brown ask God to help you take
inventory on what you have. Find the positives and count them up before you
continue to focus on the shortcomings, failures and troubles of this life and
may you find eternal satisfaction at the banquet that Christ has prepared for
you.

OOO

They Might Be Giants put on a great show last night in Columbia. They played several songs from their new album and many of my favorites from the old records. I don't know what else to say about them. They're my favorite band. Best. Concert. Ever.

One of the opening bands was ok but a little annoying and one was very cool.

The first band on was Common Rotation. It was basically just a guy with a guitar and a lead singer. The lead singer had a recurring role on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Their songs were fun and they were pretty energetic. Similar artists: They Might Be Giants, Lost and Found and Barenaked Ladies.

opening act was Corn Mo. It wasn't really a band as much as one guy with an accordian. Similar artists: Weird Al and Meat Loaf. Corn Mo was funny for a couple of songs, but he got annoying really fast. I like the accordian, but it sounds better in the context of a band (rock or polka). By itself it just gets on my nerves.

The new album, The Spine, is now available for download directly from the band's website. Support the band and save some money and a trip to your local record store and download it!

Brendan, Sara and I are leaving in just a few minutes for the concert at the Blue Note in Columbia, MO. We're going to meet up with Henry and his wife, Meredith. It should be a fun time.

My quest for free stuff has finally reached into higher education. Apparently you can access course material online and for free from Carnegie Mellon and MIT. You don't get real college credit or interaction with professors, but you do get to learn some cool stuff, which is the only reason I would take more classes anyway. I wonder if there are any seminaries doing something like this.

Last week I blew a little bubble, then captured it in a bigger bubble. So I got that going for me, which is nice.

With our eyes drooping from severe lack of sleep, Tim, Rob and I pulled into Adrian this morning at 8 am. We all slept for a couple of hours and then they headed out for St. Louis. The trip went really well after we switched to the bigger truck.

I haven't had this much to do since college! I'm working on the menu, grocery list and huge mass-o-list of other random things one (or 30 people) needs when camping in a remote region of Colorado for NYR. I'm also working on the monthly newsletter, designing some ads and, last but certainly not least, trying to raise an unruly but brilliant 2 year old. As an 'end of task' enthusiast (as opposed to that strange segment of the population that loves 'the process'), I am particularly feeling painful feelings in my ulcer region. Here's a run-down, in order, of the things I do to alleviate (or aggravate) feelings of mind-numbing stress.

5. Wax poetic on my life. This usually involves making a mental list of all the things I can't stand about (1) people (specifically myself), (2) the miserable failure I have become and (3) how much of a downer I am. Number 5 is usually resolved after talking to Danny or eating a lot of ice cream.

4. Eat a lot of ice cream. Or cookies. Or brown sugar right out of the bag.

3. Clean. It's amazing what I can find to clean, even when my surroundings are amazingly immaculate. I'm talking toothbrush-bleach-on-my-knees scrubbing. Danny can't stand it.

2. Partake in various forms of media. This is where it all happens. Because of number 5, I am usually feeling depressed and introspective and therefore want something to, first, help me wallow and, second, fix this problem. Tonight's vehicle of choice was the brilliant film Ghost World, which Brendan graciously let me watch. I caught a little of this film when we had free HBO, but never finished it. The characters, plot and black humor of this film perfectly embodied the way I was feeling, plus it starred Steve Buscemi.

1. Actually do the work I am stressing over. Although rewarding and logical, this step always eludes me. Maybe I do enjoy the process, in a weird, twisted way. Fitting.

In a sense we've come a long way on our trip. But in another, more accurate sense, we're still in Pasadena. We spent all day Tuesday cleaning out Rob's apartment and cramming his stuff into the 19 foot truck he had rented from Budget. Around 10 pm last night we finally got on the road. But as soon as we got above 50 mph the truck started rocking back and forth. I thought it was going to tip over. Rob slowed down, but it got worse. We pulled over and called Budget. They thought we were overloaded. Apparently we had done too good a job of packing. So we drove over to Peter's house and stayed there last night. Today we got a bigger truck and moved all the stuff over. The guys at the truck rental place said it was the most stuff they've ever seen crammed into a 19 foot truck. Right now we're just waiting for rush hour to end so we can get on the road.

I'm leaving tomorrow morning for a liitle trip. I'm flying to Los Angeles and helping a friend move back to Missouri. We'll probably get back sometime Thursday.